RELAX. It's a Rover.
The long-gone Longbridge concern's old ad slogan couldn't have rung more true the first time I gave the latest arrival on the Life On Cars fleet its first proper run, heading for home up the M57. Sporty this £300, 1995 Rover 214 isn't, despite it coming in a rather fetching shade of British Racing Green. If there's one word to sum up this icon of Hyacinth Bucket motoring it's... comfortable.
Thanks to it being winter I've only actually driven it in the dark so far, hence the car you see above not being the exact one sat outside, but already it's impressing me with its plush trimmings and soothing suspension. I like the tasteful - if restrained - styling, both inside and out, and the way the revvy Rover K-Series engine seems to mate perfectly with the Honda heritage in the engineering. I like the half-leather seats and the (plastic) wood trimming, and the way it comes loaded with things like electric windows and an immobiliser that works. And my mates love the fact that - for the first time ever - I'm driving something with five doors!
Where the Renault, with its flyweight engineering and suspiciously powerful engine, was a hot hatch in disguise, the regal old Rover's much more grown up, but there's lots to like about it. On wet, nasty November nights, it's nice to step into something that soothes your brow as you head home.
I'm so relaxed, in fact, that I haven't even bothered to ask the obvious questions yet. Is the notoriously fickle K-Series engine going to blow a head gasket? Are the strangely solid-looking sills hiding a lifetime of rot? And - most worryingly - is my choice of a Rover as my latest purchase meaning I'm about to prematurely celebrate my fiftieth birthday?
All, I'm sure, will be revealed in the coming weeks.
UPDATE: No more reading the manual for me, thanks to a Top Gear tuition video in all things Rover 200! Cue a very 1989 looking Chris Goffey...
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